I want to stop time…….
Every morning (especially Saturdays), I wake up in our tree nest, surrounded by my beloved books and photos of all of our adventures. My family photos dating back generations are on my bedroom shelf, easily accessible when I want to take a walk down memory lane. Our coffee maker is pumping out a pot of creme brulee half caf in the kitchen, making our whole apartment smell like a Saturday morning on Oasis. I lie in bed thinking about the day ahead…..so grateful. I think about my week at school and all of the funny, adorable things my little ones said- the feel of their sweet little heads as I lay my hand there while they work so hard in their journals. Their faces and how they lit up when I walked back into the classroom after being out sick for three days. Their hugs of welcome. God how I love them.
I think about my week ahead and the opportunities for ministry and my church family and who needs prayers. I am so, so thankful that God led me to them. I think about how I have grown this year, and healed, and struggled sometimes- but how many people have helped me and listened and counseled and prayed. I have so many people who have my back. That is a gift.
I think about my husband, quietly breathing next to me. About what a blessing it is to come home to this place and eat a meal that I cooked in our cozy kitchen, at our table that he built, and sit on our couch that we picked out together and watch the Olympics…..holding hands and making jokes and sharing joy.
I want to stop time.
Everything is so GOOD right now.
Better than it has been in a long, long time.
But, I can’t stop time. It marches on, getting faster and faster as I get older and older. That is the truth of life. Life is change. Flexibility is key. Rolling with the ups and downs. Savoring the moments. This time will not stay, but when it is gone, I will have the luxury of looking back. Of reading these words and remembering how happy I was in this moment.
It is one of the reasons I write……to preserve this. To make it stay in the only way that I know how to do. To mark the moments of my life, both hard and happy.
“The secret of life is enjoying the passage of time.”